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James Berkmyre

Varsity basketball player arrested for bringing rotisserie chicken to class

Varsity basketball player arrested for bringing rotisserie chicken to class

Oakridge High School varsity basketball player Jason Thompson found himself in legal trouble after he brought a rotisserie chicken to his class after lunch. The incident has sparked a heated debate over the dietary habits of student-athletes and the boundaries of acceptable behavior in the classroom. According to witnesses, Thompson

Texas forces wrestlers to say "no homo" before manhandling each other on the mats

Texas forces wrestlers to say "no homo" before manhandling each other on the mats

This weekends state championship tournament for Texas High School Wrestling has started off with a handsy controversy. The University Scholastic League has announced a new requirement for high school wrestlers: the mandatory verbal confirmation of "no homo" before every match. This unprecedented measure, according to the governing body,

Parents give up 'yelling at the coaches' for Lent

Parents give up 'yelling at the coaches' for Lent

Parents across the country have declared a temporary ceasefire in their relentless battles with coaches over every minutiae, and have instead opted to give up yelling and screaming for Lent. "Finally, a bit of peace on the sidelines!" exclaimed Coach Emily Davis, a long-time youth soccer coach. "

Referee on third knee replacement buys knee brace for soccer season

Referee on third knee replacement buys knee brace for soccer season

San Antonio, Texas | Local high school soccer referee, Mr. Harold Jetson, has just purchased a brand-new knee brace to assist him for the upcoming soccer season after receiving his third knee replacement surgery. Jetson, who has become something of a legend among the local sports community due to his uncanny

Head Soccer coach fired after missing district game for birthday dinner at Texas de Brazil

Coach Rick Thompson was unceremoniously relieved of his coaching duties at Meadowlark High School after skipping a crucial district soccer game to indulge in a meat factory celebration at Texas de Brazil. Thompson, known for his passionate coaching style and tactical eccentricities, made headlines when he failed to show up

High school basketball Freshman B team bus stolen during tournament game

High school basketball Freshman B team bus stolen during tournament game

Dallas, Texas | Local authorities are currently investigating the unusual disappearance of a high school basketball ball team's bus. Detective Large Johnson is suspecting that a group from the homeless population might be behind the heist. Detective Johnson, stated, "It appears the perpetrators managed to hotwire the bus